tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5517881874258683381.post6966991404226881832..comments2023-06-25T08:45:08.985-04:00Comments on Not Even A Wren: changesmeganhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10064483599165161879noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5517881874258683381.post-23191218995211642082011-07-22T07:32:39.817-04:002011-07-22T07:32:39.817-04:00Hugs babe. The new house sounds ideal .... but at...Hugs babe. The new house sounds ideal .... but at the same time, I couldn't imagine leaving THIS house where the memories live.<br />HUgs.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5517881874258683381.post-71652027136474929682011-07-20T20:26:09.779-04:002011-07-20T20:26:09.779-04:00Love bev's comment above. All so true.
I woul...Love bev's comment above. All so true. <br />I would love to see the pictures too cjafatearthlinkdotnet.<br /><br />And, I have been thinking about this post all evening and have concluded, this sums up why I have "it is what it is" inked into me. Because it is just here. This is real. This changes things. Forever. I'm not saying *I* am over, but I am different now and pain and the finiteness of everything will never not be here.carolynhttp://throughawidowseyes.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5517881874258683381.post-51650442265830246272011-07-20T19:45:38.215-04:002011-07-20T19:45:38.215-04:00I'm glad that you have decided to do *both*. ...I'm glad that you have decided to do *both*. As I wrote to you elsewhere, the way you photographed the house - the plants, the details - tells me that the place speaks to you. I hope it will be like this old house and land - a place of beauty and healing. <br /><br />An odd coincidence, I wrote something on a friend's blog yesterday, saying that I live in the shadow of the life that might have been - and a few more things about what matters in life. He wrote back to me this morning, concerned that my comment meant I believe I will live in sadness forever - which was not actually what I meant. He mentioned the Buddhist stuff about happiness which you have written about up above. I wrote a long reply, too long to get into here, but in a nutshell, that I can be happy and live in the here and now, but it is a form of happiness that is tinted by what I have been through, I cannot look at the world through rose-colored glasses anymore. Sometimes it seems like my life is like Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz. I cannot be fooled by wizards anymore. I know they are nothng more than curmudgeonly old men behind curtains. I am the watchmaker who has seen the inside workings of a watch and, when I hear one ticking, can never forget that that there are little wheels and gears making that sound. I cannot "live in the present" without all that I have learned about life and death - the sad, hard stuff that makes other flinch and turn away. What I can do is to walk onwards, able to acknowledge pain without being knocked down, or witness the happiness of others without feeling sad or angry and thinking "why them and not me". For me, that is what it means to be able to live in the here and now. I shall order a copy of "At Hell's Gate" and maybe read it this winter when I have more time. Right now, I am too busy just living here in the present - fixing up a wrecky old house will do that to you.bevhttp://magickcanoe.com/blog14noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5517881874258683381.post-60142362158284468732011-07-20T18:27:42.838-04:002011-07-20T18:27:42.838-04:00WOW. So much in this post. It's like your whol...WOW. So much in this post. It's like your whole life is in here. The house sounds incredible in lots of ways. I am happy and hope it works out for you.<br /><br />I laughed out loud a couple times. You really hit it, here, with all the you-can-do-it b.s. (corollary of you're-so-strong b.s.) and the world-is-perfect b.s. <br />I have found that what the brouhaha of "breathing" and "mindfulness" does for me is allow me to absorb the pain, acknowledge it RIGHT HERE, HURTING ME, and breathe THROUGH it, rather than pretend it does not exist or does not matter. It totally f&kng matters and informs everything I do joyful or otherwise.<br />And I know that shit's been bugging you for a while now so how nice to read it on The Day, especially after dreading the guy's words. Thanks for sending, M. <br />It's similar to what bugs the hell out of me, which is that attitude is everything if you have cancer, which translates to if you die you didn't want to live enough. Well, fuuuuuuuuuuuuuck you, people. The people who talk that way the most are the ones, as you say, "safe and alive".carolynhttp://throughawidowseyes.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5517881874258683381.post-48357465360880870492011-07-20T18:00:51.717-04:002011-07-20T18:00:51.717-04:00send me the link. i'd like to see the house. ...send me the link. i'd like to see the house. abandonedsouls@hotmail.com<br /><br />you've been in my thoughts, as you always are.<br /><br />i wish you peace.abandonedsoulshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06020499806998154330noreply@blogger.com